'Everything you want is on the other side of fear' - KC Ejelonu

The voices in my head saying “Am I good enough?”, “What will people say or think about me?” Sometimes you feel like you are alone, but everyone feels exactly the same way at some point in their life, it’s just that in this society we live in (Nigeria) people are not use to talking about it.

I have been peeling away layers of all the accumulated stuff in my mind, body and soul just to find who I am at the core.

“If we are not fully ourselves, truly in the present moment, we miss everything.” – Thich Nhat Hanh

You know at some point in my life I can recollect saying this phrase a lot “I am scared tho” especially when it came to me going after what I really wanted in life.

Living like this was not living at all, I can say this now that having such mentality is pure evil to anyone’s state of mind. When you decide to leave fear behind to move forward in life, weeding out people you don’t need around you will only be natural. You need friends and family that will see your potential, know your strength and your weakness but will not let you rest on your weakness or hold your past failures over your head. I can confidently say my families are my best supporters and they keep me in check always.

Fela Durotoye came to speak at my Church and he shared some things that are now printed inside my mind. First of all, the title of this article was a statement he made…”Everything you want is on the other side of fear”.

Now don’t expect to do this all alone, the best teacher or coach you need in your life is God. I said to him, I want to live differently, I don’t know about others but I want to live in the manner at which I can make you proud and my family proud because at the end of the day, that’s all that matters.

Fela Durotoye shared ten steps to take if we choose to live a lifestyle of leadership and excellence and this helps with breaking away from the fear factor and every other negative thing dwelling in our minds

“Make a positive impact on everyone you meet and everywhere you go”

“Be a solution provider and not a part of the problem to be solved”

“Be a role model worthy of emulation”

“Be your best in all you do, particularly the things you are naturally good at”

“Do the right thing at all times regardless of who is doing the wrong thing”

“Value time and make the best use of it”

“Care and show respect through your words and actions”

“Consciously build a great legacy starting NOW, TODAY AND EVERYDAY”

“Live a life of integrity and honor”

“Make your family, your nation and your God proud”.

Do you want to start living authentically? Do you want fear behind you? Do you want that success so bad but you are scared of what people will say or think about you? Well, here are some tips:

DO LESS, BE MORE…..

“Doing nothing, is better than being busy doing nothing” – Lao Tzu.

As you move through your busy days, you can tuck away few statements in the back of your mind and decide if your movement, tasks and job reflect the life you really want to live.

Do less of what does not serve you and be more of who you are by aligning your decisions to these intentions.

PLAN LESS, LIVE MORE….

“Most of the shadows of life are caused by standing in our own sunshine” – Ralph Waldo Emerson.

The more we shift our fears by clinging onto something outside of us, instead of looking inside to acknowledge and dissolve it, the more we will stand in our own way. Life is transient, there is only so much we can plan for, but there is much more happiness to be experienced when we learn to live in the flow. Fearing less means letting go and flowing more and truly experiencing life in all of its wholeness.

DWELL LESS, CREATE MORE…

“Begin at once to live and count each day as a separate life” – Seneca

The past and future are overrated, what really rocks is “the moment”. Learn to continually let go of what you cannot control, stop telling the stories of the past or peering so much into the future. Redirect all that energy to this moment and what you can create that is beautiful.

KC Ejelonu is a Nollywood actress, Producer and Writer. Founder of Gwladys Productions. Follow her on twitter @ kcejelonu