You can only help the people you can with the little you have.
1. Not having a vision (no purpose)
It might surprise you to know that a large number of people live without a vision for themselves. Most of them simply live life one day at a time and are okay with simply surviving.
Having a vision is key to steering your life in the direction you want it. When you have a vision, it drives every action you take. You make daily, weekly, monthly and yearly plans on how to achieve that vision. You have a reason to wake up everyday lively, happy and confident because you have a vision.
If you don't have a vision for yourself, your life would be directionless because it is only your intent, desire and will that can motivate and inspire you to act in the direction of the life you want.
Why not consciously create a long term vision for yourself? You will see yourself grow beyond just living for yourself and making tremendous progress in your career.
2. Trying to please everybody
If you want to be happy and avoid living a life of frustration and deep regrets, you must be cognizant of the fact that you cannot just please everybody, no matter what you do.
You cannot help everybody. It's not possible. You can only help the people you can with the little you have. You don't go bankrupt because you want to help or please others.
Sometimes we try too hard to please relatives and friends by always following their opinions or suggestions. But as an individual, you have to learn to think for your own self. No other person is inside your head or knows what you want better that you! Why allow others to always make the most important decisions for your life?
It's needless to focus on pleasing other people, when you know deep down that you're unhappy with what you're doing because of them. It makes no sense.
I think every individual deserves the right to be happy and pursue happiness, therefore you don't have to mortgage your happiness just to please people all the time. Consider the opinion of other people, but understand that it's not a must you go by their opinions every time.
3. Not knowing yourself
Lots of people are just living without making a proper analysis of themselves. They ignore fundamental questions they should have asked about themselves early enough and before you know it, it becomes too late.
You cannot just decide to do anything without knowing how capable or suited you are for it. First of all, you have to know yourself, know your strengths and your weaknesses, then make a list of things that really resonates with your person and just do it..
If you don't know yourself yet, going ahead to do just anything will lead to frustration. That's why you see people spend five years in the university and yet they don't know what they're meant to do with their lives.
Knowing yourself has to do with understanding your spirituality and asking some fundamental questions about your existence, why you're here, where you're from and what you're meant to do. Deep thought, prayers and meditations could be of immense help.
4. Waiting for the perfect time
I keep saying that there's no time that is perfect. Right now is just as good as any other time you can think of. It's easy to procrastinate when you're waiting for a perfect time. Every time is perfect, but question is how well you're prepared and ready to maximize this time right now.
Time actually waits for no man and one of the most valuable and limited resources you have at your disposal is your time. We won't be here forever. Time is always ticking. So what you do with your time really counts. It should either buy you more time or get you closer to your dreams.
Therefore, If you're already prepared, I see no need waiting for a more opportune moment. Kick start that idea immediately.
5. Always making excuses
Are you good at making excuses? Excuses like
"The lecturer didn't teach us very well, that's why I failed," "Nigeria is a corrupt country, that's why I'm jobless and unsuccessful," "I won't talk to them, because they've not called me," "I have not started the business because of capital," because of this and that. For how long will you continue?
The bad habit of making excuses paves a very easy way to frustration. It looks like it takes away the blame or responsibility from your shoulder and throws it on other people or the environment, but the truth is that there are really no excuses for us to have not achieved anything.
No matter what it is, you as an individual, created in God's image and likeness has everything it takes to achieve your objectives despite what may be happening around you. It's not motivational speaking. It's just the fact. Check out the lives of great men and women who have excelled in life. Most them have a thousand reasons why they could have given up and keep on living an average life, but they were proactive and their painful experiences were never an excuse to stop them.
Think about these things and make needed changes (if any) to avoid future frustration.
Until next time,
Written by Ogbuchi Nigel Ikechukwu
Ogbuchi Nigel Ikechukwu is an aspiring author, a blogger and an engineer who is passionate about helping people to live better lives. He is the founder of the inspirational blog, www.boldwinner.com