Bartenders share 13 things they'd love to tell customers but can't

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November 12, 2017 4:48 PM

There are some things that bartenders just won't tell you, even if it's to everyone's benefit.

While you may have the liquid courage to say whatever you want in a bar, there are some things that bartenders just won't tell you, even if it's to everyone's benefit.

So Business Insider asked more than 30 bartenders to weigh in on what they'd love to tell customers but can't.

We've anonymously included some of the more constructive insights here:

'Please don't order vodka'

"You're nice when you stick with beer, but a demon on spirits."

'Use cash to pay for a single drink'

"Running credit cards is more time consuming than a cash transaction, and the tiny tip from one drink is not worth my extra time."

Proceed ordering mixed drinks with caution

"Almost no restaurants or bars clean their ice machines as regularly as they're supposed to. "

'I'm a person — please treat me like one'

"I am not a servant. I am not a potential date. Please don't take advantage of the fact that I have to treat you in a professional manner. This is my place of employment, not your house. You are the guest here. Please behave like one."

'Order everything at once'

"Don't have me make a margarita, then order your buddy a beer only to realize his girl wanted a margarita, too."

'I'd love to tell people just how disgusting they are when they're eating'

'I see you and I will get to you the second I can'

'Stop hitting on your bartender'

"The bartender does not want to date you."

'Put your laptop away — you’re not fooling anyone'

"Stop trying to 'work' at a bar. You’re a functional alcoholic. Cram your drinking in now and your work in tomorrow."

'Money talks and bulls--t walks'

'That girl will not go home with you just because you bought her a $9 shot'

But it often has the opposite effect.

'You're overpaying for super expensive cocktails'

'I'm judging you on your drink order.'

"You can tell what type of person someone is by their drink order in specific bars."

"If you're in a bar with tons of other people and it's loud and you order something complicated, you clearly don't value people's time. How you react to the bar being out of your 'usual' is also very indicative of your personality."

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