21 of the wildest office holiday party stories we've ever heard

But it's important to remember, you're still on company time, and how you behave matters.

As a lesson to us all, we asked readers — and combed the web — for wild

Some answers have been edited for clarity.

'Our new janitor has no idea why everyone is treating him so nicely'

"There was this quiet, old janitor that worked our office building who was scheduled to retire on Christmas, so our Christmas party kind of included his farewell; we gave gifts to each other, put up a Christmas tree, people brought cakes and pastries, Christmas stuff.

"Then here comes the old janitor and he leaves a fairly big bag of presents under the tree; we're all kind of surprised because no one seemed to interact with him that much, but nonetheless we thank him and wish him the best and stuff, then he leaves and presumably sets off to the Midwest. The next day, we open the presents, including his.

"Turns out, the retiring janitor gave everyone in the office a little bottle of sulfuric acid. Everybody got one, even me, I still have it. We don't know where he got them or how much they cost, but apparently he hated our guts.

"Our new janitor has no idea why everyone is treating him so nicely."

'That was a mistake'

"My friend is in charge of a number of temporary hires, contract workers, and freelancers at an ad agency. Her company's HR department sent a mass save-the-date email for the holiday party to everyone, including the people she has under her. That was a mistake. She now has to contact each one and tell them they are not invited to the company party."

'The guy who brought the brownies grabbed the wrong plate ... '

"A place that I worked at about eight years ago had a huge party. One of the managers brought brownies and the director of operations (let's call him Jack) was the first to try them as we were setting up the food table.

"About half an hour later, as we were finishing up, Jack starts giggling and talking about how tall he feels. The guy who brought the brownies grabbed the wrong plate as he left the house and accidentally brought pot brownies.

"Needless to say, we gathered as many of the stoners as we could to clear that plate before anyone else got to them and tried to keep Jack away from other management."

Redditor

'I won't be telling any more stories at holiday parties for a while'

"It was the first holiday party my office had hosted in many years. Naturally many employees were eager to take advantage and enjoy the well-earned libations. I was tentative at first, but joined the fray once I saw that upper management was fully committed to the good time, i.e. getting completely hammered.

"I quickly caught up to the pack, thoroughly enjoying myself and telling many stories, as I am want to do. Unfortunately, I got a little too caught up in the moment and, at the climax of a particular story, swung my arms in the air for emphasis.

"As I did, my hand hit the bottom of a beer bottle just as my colleague put it to her lips, causing her to hit herself with it. After the initial shock had worn off and she cleaned up the spilled beer on her clothes, she turned to tell me she was OK, and if I wasn't feeling bad enough, my guilt skyrocketed: As she spoke I noticed that her front tooth had broken as a result of the bottle hitting her face. It wasn't completely knocked out, but it was chipped well enough to be unmistakable.

"I felt completely horrible and informed her of what happened, and she ran to the bathroom to confirm. To her credit, she was slightly embarrassed when she returned but stayed at the party and went out of her way to tell me that it was no big deal. Regardless, I still felt like a jerk the rest of the night.

"A few days later she went to the dentist and had the tooth fixed, and it was a relief that no permanent damage had occurred. But I won't be telling any more stories at holiday parties for a while."

'I hid in the bushes down the street until my significant other picked me up two hours later'

"I worked as a maintenance facilities man for a large school and foster home for troubled children. I showed up at the work Christmas party that was hosted by the programs nurse. Social anxiety troubled me a lot back then, so before I even knocked on the door I'd drank eight nips of vodka.

"Within twenty minutes of being there I fell down a full flight of stairs and crashed through their screen door. This happened in front of about twenty coworkers including the program's administration and my immediate supervisors.

"After apologizing and slurring profusely I told everybody that my ride was out front to pick me up. I hid in the bushes down the street until my significant other picked me up two hours later."

—Redditor

' ... his Christmas dinner was thoroughly ruined ... '

"Let me preface this by saying that my team and I love hot sauces — the hotter and more exotic the better. We collect them and share them around when we find a good one.

"My team went out to a fancy Italian restaurant in the Denver area a few Christmases ago, and one of the guys had gone to a specialty spice store downtown and bought some whole Ghost Chili peppers to use in some chili. He saved one and produced it that night at dinner; daring anyone to eat it.

"Being more on the machismo side of things, one of the other guys accepted the challenge and chomped it down whole. After turning redder than Rudolph's nose, and having mild hallucinations, he ended up vomiting all over the floor of one of the side server rooms of the restaurant.

"Needless to say many laughs were had by all on behalf of his overestimated pain tolerance, and his Christmas dinner was thoroughly ruined because he said 'things didn't taste right' for several days afterwards."

' ... with a mop.'

"My boss made out with a mop."

—Redditor

' ... all before cocktail hour even ended'

"One year, a coworker and I were about 45 minutes late to the cocktail hour portion of our company's holiday party. Upon our arrival, we noticed a coworker's husband half passed out at a table. He managed to drink so much just in the first 30 minutes of cocktail hour that he vomited in the bathroom and half passed out at a table ... all before cocktail hour even ended. So embarrassing."

'Yeah, I work for one of 'those' startups'

"Our CEO got drunk and announced that he would be taking the entire company on vacation to Cancun. Ten months later, he did. Yeah, I work for one of 'those' startups."

—Redditor

' ... no one knew why, but we all did it'

"At my office party at my old company, the CEO thought it would be a fun party game to have everyone submit an embarrassing childhood story ahead of time — no one knew why, but we all did it.

"Then at the party he had them all printed on pieces of paper, and he had people read them aloud and guess who's story it was. It was incredibly awkward and probably the worst work-party game of all time."

'Police came, but no charges were filed ... '

"At last year's office party, this 22-year-old kid got drunk and basically cursed me out in front of everyone. He then threw a punch at me.

"I simply stepped aside and watched him fall over. He ended up breaking his arm, lost a tooth, and lost a job. Police came, but no charges were filed as he didn't make any sort of contact."

—Redditor

'The next day he came into work with a busted chin and a bruised ego'

"

'His apathetic continuation of floor waxing seemed to both sum up and punctuate the entire night'

"I was leaving the office where I worked, a government department, so the end-of-year party was also a de facto farewell party for me. As far as stuffy office parties where the entire drinks menu is funded by taxpayers, it was pretty damn swinging.

"Anyway, about an hour into it a girl I had been talking to all year comes up and asks if I want to get out of there. 'Hell, yes, I do.' She says we should go get coffee and then there is something she wants to show me because it might be the last time I ever see her. I say my final goodbyes to my boss and workers, all lovely people, and duck out of the party before it winds down to go get coffee with this woman who I'd been hitting it off really well with, or so I thought.

"We get to a cafe, order drinks, chat for a bit, and the second the waiter walks away, she drags out all of these charts and forms — even had a little A-stand for her presentation — asking me to sign up for Amway.

"I drank my scaldingly hot coffee way too quickly and noped the hell out of there to run back to my party, but it was too late, and the only person there was the janitor. His apathetic continuation of floor waxing seemed to both sum up and punctuate the entire night."

—Redditor

'I never asked what I did to get this nickname, and I really don't want to know'

"Once my boss challenged me to a shot contest at the start of the night. I blacked out shortly thereafter, but when I came in to work the next day, I had received the new nickname of 'Steak Pants." I never asked what I did to get this nickname, and I really don't want to know."

—Redditor

' ... a memo came out saying if you were arrested the company would not bail you out of jail'

"Two days before my first work Christmas party, a memo came out saying if you were arrested the company would not bail you out of jail.

"A year before, several people were arrested for doing coke outside the Christmas party. The CEO had to bail them all out of jail."

—Redditor

' ... everyone still talks about it'

"I was working freelance last year, and the production company threw a Christmas party at a pub near the office, where there were pong tables set up for flip cup and beer pong.

"Everyone had a few drinks, and another — tiny! — freelance producer was sitting on the ping pong table talking to this guy when all of a sudden the table collapses, beer spills everywhere, and she's on the floor of the bar.

"It's funny because she's so tiny and nobody was really that drunk (and nobody got hurt). But everyone at that production company still talks about it.

"As do I. It was hilarious."

''Don't tell Bruce ...''

"I saw a coworker complain about a recent assignment, then say, 'Don't tell Bruce I was complaining.' She was talking to her boss, Bruce."

—Redditor

'The gallery was removed from public access within the hour'

"After rolling into the office the morning following my company holiday party, I received the company-wide email blast providing a link to the photo booth gallery.

"After scrolling through several hours of tame photos, I discovered a series of 25 pictures showing my boss in a progressing state of undress while hooking up with a colleague from a different department.

"The gallery was removed from public access within the hour, and both photo subjects were sent to HR."

—Anonymous Business Insider reader

'I'm 21 years sober now'

"I was three months sober and white knuckling it through my first holiday party at a fancy country club when they started handing out the raffle gifts.

"I won a $25 gift certificate to the liquor store.

"Merry Christmas to me!

"I re-gifted it to a friend. I'm 21 years sober now."

—Anonymous Business Insider reader

'He managed to stop her, but not before about 1,000 people looked on in amazement'

"Some years ago, we had our Christmas party at a local hotel and had some entertainment including a hypnotist.

"He asked for volunteers, and several people went on stage. He went through the process of hypnotising them and ended up with several people in the state of hypnosis.

"The hypnotist then told them there was a big pile of hundred-dollar bills in front of them, and they could have all they could carry away.

"One of our employees immediately pulled her dress up and starting stuffing imaginary money into her panty hose. Yikes!

"He managed to stop her, but not before about 1,000 people looked on in amazement.

"She was a good sport about it, and we decided not to hire a hypnotist in the future."

—Anonymous Business Insider reader

'Yeah...I didn't end up going'

"This year's Christmas party was $35 a ticket with no meal included, and everyone was required to bring a secret Santa gift worth at least $25. So that's $60 to spend time with my coworkers... Yeah...I didn't end up going."

—Redditor

And a 'bonus' story just for kicks

"The company I work for introduced new end-of-year bonuses, and one of them was a trip to Rome.

"As a developer team, we won this bonus, and the next day we flew to the Rome. However, on the plane, we started to drink, and the next thing we know, we were in a plane to Istanbul, Turkey.

"Nobody knows how, when, and where we decided to go to Istanbul instead of Rome. Later on we understood that, in London (where we had to wait five hours for the next plane), we changed our tickets to Istanbul. It was nice though — beautiful city, warm people, and delicious dishes."

—Anonymous Business Insider reader

21 of the wildest office holiday party stories we've ever heard

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